So in the Money Pit, we’ve got a toilet problem. They’re original to the house down to nuts & bolts & they’ve got a problem with anything more than water. As in, no matter what your business is, you’re using a plunger. I think we all remember what happened when the freakin’ dog clogged the toilet the first week in the house.
Thanks to Doug’s contacts through work & a good friend, we were able to get some really great toilets at cost & I never thought I’d be stoked about how great these toilets are at flushing, but here I am, almost thirty, totally stoked about poopers. While Doug & I aren’t the most handy people, we have common sense & YouTube so we figured we would give toilet installation a whirl. While all three need to be replaced, I was mostly interested in getting the upstairs hall complete before next week since my cousin is staying with us over Thanksgiving & I’d like to not have to provide her with fresh towels & a clean plunger at the same time.
Then everything went to shit. Literally.
The first problem was that the original toilet was in such awful shape that the bolts were corroded, meaning we had to saw them off with a teeny saw & our faces down in the rust & yuck. The tank broke when we popped it off since it had been screwed on too tight & then when we lifted the bowl, we had a lovely surprise of raw sewage. Except we’d never used this toilet, so now we were face-to-face with old shit that wasn’t even ours.
Oh, I’m sorry. You weren’t eating, were you?
We get the new toilet on & no, there is no tutorial because I HAVE NO IDEA HOW DIY BLOGGERS DO IT. Like, I’m up to my elbows in a trash bag full of someone else’s shit & Harry’s standing at the door asking if that is poop on repeat & Doug is like I HATE THIS HOUSE & when am I supposed to be taking pictures? pffft.
Also corroded: the valve & hose, which means we had to replace those but they’re not sealing properly & by removing the 20-year-old toilet, we were faced with the realization that no amount of clorox could fix the nasty old floor around it. So
off to the home improvement store I went to pick out tile. Which we had planned to do eventually, but probably not for a solid two years when we were ready to yank out the vanity. I went with a dark slate tile because it’s a boys bathroom & boys are dirty & found a picture on Pinterest that I liked.
Then I called our handyman because we’re one week until Turkey Day & visitors & none of our shitters work properly & ain’t nobody got time for that.